Learning to love someone else in recovery can be difficult but so can learning to love oneself. Recovery is a difficult time, particularly in the area of relationship building and learning how to rebuild existing relationships broken apart by addiction. Learn how to love again in ways that do not interfere with recovery.
Learning to love oneself is a key aspect of recovery. Rehabilitation transforms self loathing into positive feelings of confidence and self assurance. When a person learns to derive pleasure in hobbies and areas of interest, the individual develops pride. Shame can bury one’s true self which must be released in order to heal from the trauma of addiction.
Learning to love others in recovery is a tricky subject. Early in recovery, it is not recommended individuals seek out romantic relationships or partnerships as it can be difficult to navigate emotional situations new relationships bring while simultaneously dealing with the challenges of recovery. However, it is an important skill to acquire one a person is ready to pursue a relationship. Recovery is about seeing the erroneous path of addiction and seeking ways to amend the negatives to become positive.
The following are just a few ways to help a person get started in learning to love again in recovery:
Let go of pain
Resistance is futile as pain is a part of life. Embracing pain is part of recovery and letting go of past hurts to learn how to love again is crucial to success.
Let go of bitterness
The way to let go of bitterness towards others is to focus on positive qualities and experiences. People from the past are not evil, the individuals were just not a good fit for that time of life. Looking at the good brought to a person’s life can help enhance past perspective to build a more positive, forward-thinking perspective to relationships in recovery.
Let go of resentment
Giving thanks for people who came in and out of life up to this point helps build gratitude and respect for others, Make a small gratitude list to start or end the day to help move from focusing on resentments to finding gratitude in small things which eventually leads to big things.
Let go of expectations
There are no expectations in recovery. The way to be happy is to let go of any conditions placed on how others must be in terms of looks, profession or other markers. Be open to possibilities and see what happens.
Fear can stop a person from embracing what is right in front of an individual. Don’t let fear be a reason to hold back and get stuck. Learning to overcome fears is what recovery is all about. Jump in, go for it and release the fear by doing it anyway.
Learning to let go of the past is important in recovery, and life. Hired Power can help you strategize ways to get beyond addiction to the life you both want and deserve.
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“I don’t look at you (Hired Power) as hiring a service, I look at you as saving my life.” (referring to his ability to stay sober after returning home).